It was very strange to be at work. To see his desk with his coat, but not him. To have his keys in my hand, but not have asked him for them. To go in the spaces he went. To do the things he would have done.
He wasn’t there. Nor would he ever be again.
The rest of my day was an overwhelming combination of anger and sorrow. Angry that he had been so selfish. Angry that he left us all here to deal with his mess. Sad that he just wasn’t there anymore. That he felt so broken and desperate that he had to take his own life.
I had found it in the deep dark depths of my closet. Hidden away in the bottom of a cardboard box, where the rest of my life was being kept. I pulled it out upon recognition and decided to throw … Continue reading →
As I sat next to him, it became more and more obvious that something was terribly wrong. It was until he fell off the bed gasping for air, that I was aware it was worse than I feared. I called … Continue reading →
“Wanna ride with me to the gas station?” “Sure.” Instantly I began regretting asking. As she talked at me (because lately she has conversations at me and not with me), I began to realize something about getting older. You are … Continue reading →
In painful memory Our eyes burn With the salt water Filled oceans And our hearts ache With the pain Of a thousand Scars Reopened We fear When we lose everything Not because we have Nothing left to lose But because … Continue reading →
The plane ride was much faster for some reason on the way home. I dreaded touch down. I dreaded stepping off the gateway that made me feel closer to him. The moment I got my bags and stepped into the … Continue reading →