Quote taken from “Cocaine Blues” by Kerry Greenwood.
The above quote is far too close to the social realities so many women face. The worst part is most women cultivate this issue within women. Lead them to believe that because you are female you ought to cling to people so wholeheartedly that they create toxicity and push people out of their life. This becomes devastating to the female who is clingy. They have been conditioned to be fragile and offended when their connection seems less valid. When they feel are not priority or exclusive in the friendship they begin to feel they are not valued, and retaliate towards the “offending” female by whatever measure they deem necessary.
Females are allowed to be free and independent from their female friends. They do not need to cling to other women, but rather empower and stand beside them as they feel necessary and based on their abilities. A woman is allowed Learn from another women, but not exclusively from only one of them. They should hear many voices from many experiences. Female friendships are a tribe. A community of women allowed to live in sisterhood with each other, but with the greatest obligation to herself. To take care of herself, reflect on herself, to grow and challenge herself.
Women are also allowed to out grow each other and move to other tribes or between tribes. If a woman find herself in a tribe where her growth is becoming limited or she no longer feels connected, she is allowed to leave the tribe in search of a new one or allowed to enrich her life by visiting other tribes. She is allowed her independence in this journey. She is allowed to be free and wild if she so chooses. She is allowed to go on journeys alone and to come back new or wounded from that journey.
Women do not have time to feed the toxicity of other women. A woman’s obligation is to herself and her journey. What good is she to her tribe if she is not looking for ways to better herself? To cling onto other women is to potentially hold them back. To hold herself back. Or both.