With tears in my eyes I unpacked my bag. Putting my pants and Christmas sweater away I kept repeating my new found mantra over and over again: “It’s our last Christmas alone. Our last.” But I found little comfort in it. I knew we’d be together for Christmas for a very long time after we were married, but that night, I really was anticipating seeing him the next morning, and I found out via poor weather report, it simply was too dangerous to happen.
I was so disappointed that I almost didn’t have the heart to message him. To let him know it was going to be too bad to get there. Five hour drive through Milwaukee and Chicago during an ice and snow combination storm? Not a good idea. I didn’t want him to be sad though. Optimist that he can be, I didn’t want to disappoint him. This was the kind of thing that might disappoint and discourage him.
I messaged him all the same.
“I have some bad news baby…we may not be coming to visit. Bad weather on our end with 4 inches of snow followed by freezing rain tomorrow from noon to midnight.”
It took him a little while before he responded to the message.
It’s not gonna be Christmas without you.
I hope that the weather fairs better, if it doesn’t, then we’ll have Christmas with each other when we can. I’ll pray for a Christmas with you. The next Christmas, we’ll be waking up to each other every morning.
I love you so much baby.”
Optimist as always. As his light shines hopefully I was under a dark cloud. I wanted to be with him for Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. I wanted to watch him open his gifts and drink hot coco and talk stupid and goof off. But that wasn’t going to happen. We were just going to have to figure stuff out. Either I’d ship the gifts to everyone, or I would have to wait to bring them. It would all have to do. I cannot change weather patterns. So I snuggled into my chair, set up my laptop, and watched Sin City and Sin City: A Dame to Kill For. Back to back.
Merry Christmas me.