I saw it was your birthday the other day. Guess no one had the heart to report your account as deceased on Facebook. It’s cool though, it’s nice to have the reminder and to scroll through all your funny posts and encouraging words. I read them in your voice too, which made my eyes a little misty during my lunch break. Had to stop and read the rest at home, which was super inconvenient because my phone data is shotty at best when I’m not bumming wifi from wherever I can. worth waiting for things to load though. I needed to be reminded of you.
I miss you. I often find myself flashing back to our time in the design studio. You telling me stories of your childhood. Your time in the service. Your time in seminary. Your lovely and senile mother-in-law doing or saying something funny that past week. I also remember how you always wanted to take me out to Big Bowl so I could eat more…because you knew I was a poor intern and skipping meals a lot.
I remember the warmth of your hand on my shoulder as you critiqued my design work. How you were honest, but tactful, and how you taught me that there are ways to critiquing to teach, and not just to make money. I remember how special you made me feel, and on occasion how singled out you made me feel, but only when it was necessary. Like the time you bought me that awesome red leather daily planner, and told me that I needed to get my crap together. I still have it, with the hole punch you gave me so I could design my own pages. I don’t get to use it much these days, my planner is pretty much on my phone now, but I’ll never get rid of it. I don’t think I could knowing it came from you.
I could have sworn I had heard you humming the other day. I was sitting in the office at work checking my e-mails when I thought I heard you humming “You Got a Friend In Me” like you used to in the studio before scolding yourself saying “Nope, stop it…no humming.” Your soft and quite voice always had a smile in it, even when I wasn’t looking at you I could hear your smile. Even scolding yourself or others. I though I had heard it then, but it turned out I was trying so hard to hear you that I made you up.
I don’t know if there are birthdays in heaven, and if not I hope heaven is even better than we all believe it to be so your birthday is worth overlooking. As far as I’m concerned your birthday is not overlooked, but I’m only human, and down here there are so few things really worth celebrating. You were definitely one of them.
I can’t wait to see you again, but for now I just wanna say I miss you now you’re gone. Blessings Friend. Happy Birthday.